Inside Out
by Pure-Evil-Me
Summary: Izzie's diary & updates on life, early season 2
1. Chapter 1

**Hey this is my first Grey's Anatomy fic so sorry if it's kinda crappy.Basically this going to be Izzie's diary and some commentry on the day if I get some ideas I might have a go at writing other character diarys.Well hope you like it, please reply.**

_Friday 7th October_

_You know what; I hate weighing scales. They suck really; unlike humans they just can't lie. I mean you get on once, get the 'wrong' reading and try it again. This time the stupid thing still hasn't had a change of heart, so you try for the third time. And unlike men, friends and your mother the damn thing won't lie. I'm happy with my weight don't get me wrong but being happy doesn't fit you in that tiny red dress. Ok I'm going on a bit now, but it's my diary so it's kind of my choice. I'm still not entirely sure why I'm doing this, because Lord knows everyone around here keeps enough things secret._

_So my day; not fantastic. Though I always knew life as an intern wasn't about to be lounging around on beaches but bloody hell, I've never been so happy to get home. I still wouldn't give it up though. And it's official, Cristina is the worlds worst patient. I've never had a patient that would rather diagnose **my** patients, rather than have bed rest. I would be grateful for the time off. Actually no I don't think I would like to be in that position, where I had, to have the time off. _

_Meredith's barely said a word all week and we all know that's McDreamy's fault. Honestly, how hard would it have been to mention he was married before Satan, sorry Addison, showed up? And just how did he expect him and Meredith to be serious when he can't seem to find a decent set of divorce papers. This hasn't been easy on George either; I've seen him have to hold back insults for Derek, purely out of care for Meredith. All this time and he still loves her. I think I'm the only one with a less dramatic life at the moment. How long is that supposed to last over here? _

"Stevens, writing up your homework like a good girl?" joked Alex upon finding the familiar blonde using her spare 5 minutes to write her first diary entry. She was the only person in that place who gave him the time of day, the only one he didn't feel like acting like a complete jerk to.

"You're in cheerful mood; what surgery did you get?" Izzie asked knowingly, as she slipped the diary back into her bag. Alex might have been growingly less taunting to her but Izzie still didn't fancy risking him reading the little book.

"Brain tumour removal" he smiled leaning on her locker, observing the loose curls hanging out of her ponytail. "Look if you're not doing anything tonight, do you want to go for a drink with me?" he added hoping his charm was still working.

"See you tonight" Izzie answered, lightly kissing him on the cheek as her pager warned her to hurry up and check on spinal facture, cubicle 3. She could hardly wait for this shift to finish, especially if Cristina planned on assessing every patient she had that day.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the great replies, hope you all like this part.Hopfully later on I'll write other character P.O.V.s till then hope this is ok please reply.**

_Saturday 8th October_

_I hate men! Well maybe not all of them just certain ones that treat you crappy all evening and refuse to tell you what's wrong. I didn't even get a kiss. Not that I wanted to kiss him anyway, I mean he's Alex. I know something's wrong, he was a totally different person in the afternoon, then a few hours pass and suddenly I'm going out with a complete stranger. I hope he's ok; actually no I don't care about him. Why should I after the total lack of respect I got? Even better I now have to deal with everyone telling me they were right, I was wrong and he's a jerk. Tell me something new._

_George has been doing my head in since I got home last night. So far I've had 4 different 'he's evil, why do you like him' speeches. I know he cares and trust me I appreciate it but seriously, I know I should have seen this coming. Sort of. I suppose Meredith's situation's worse. McDreamy didn't sign the paper, he's staying with the Devil herself over my best friend. Well he might not be staying with her, maybe his car broke down or something and he couldn't meet Meredith. No! He's a man and I'm tired of making excuses for them. He screwed up; and now my friend's hurt. Some days you really want to slap someone._

_Right I've got to go someone's tapping on my door. I swear to God if this is George about to either tell me how evil Alex or Derek is, then I'm going to out-bake the bloody bakery._

"Hey Mere, you ok?" asked Izzie in response to the tear stained face of her friend. Inviting her into the room, Izzie soon found her supplies of chocolates and tissues to share with Meredith.

"Why are men stupid? She croaked in response finally giving up on pretending she didn't care. She'd grown so tired saying she was fine. Hadn't there already been enough lies lately? Mid-way through the cry session George turned up in the doorway with coffee for the 2 girls. He just couldn't understand how his co-workers had the ability to hurt his friends so easily.


	3. Chapter 3

**This part's a bit short but hope you like it. Let me know if you're reading**

"Come on I'll help, and you'll finish up here early" insisted Cristina who'd earlier been cocooned in her bed with extra blankets, so her friends could make sure she got rest on her last day as a patient. She loved this place; just not on this side.

"No, no; no! Now eat your chocolates and get better" ordered Izzie closing the door on her way out, as the best way to end that conversation. She knew 2 more hours and she'd be home, though not all patients were that difficult today. She changed her mind about getting coffee, just as turned the corner she saw someone else lining up to use the drinks machine. Talking to Alex wasn't top of her agenda that day so instead Izzie made her way to the locker rooms.

_Monday 10th October_

_Guess I gotta admit today hasn't been bad. I'm so happy, it's Cristina's last day as a patient. Now that's good because 1, she's a friend who I want to be well and 2; she's driving me insane! Meredith seems a lot better now after the weekends little cry fest even George seems to have stopped lecturing us. Poor bloke, stuck with us 2. Mind Bailey did give him the problematic patients I usually get today, bar for Cristina obviously. I never really imagined myself as the 'diary-writing' type, though I suppose it does help keep track of what's going on. And far too much goes on here._

_Coffee, coffee, wow I really need some caffeine now. And why am I deprived of coffee I don't hear you ask? Because I'm locked in a locker room avoiding the only person making today not so great. I want to talk to him, but I don't want to. Makes perfect sense doesn't it? Why am I asking questions to a diary? See what the lack of caffeine's done to me. Well if I don't go now I won't have another chance till the end of shift. And that's just far too long. Promise I'll write in here tonight but for now I'm off to get an energy boost, avoid someone and make sure my patients aren't dying._


	4. Chapter 4

**Ok here's the next part sorry it took so long but I'm starting to run out of ideas if you have any ideas feel free to let me know**

_Monday 10th October_

_Well I said I'd write more here later and well, now's later .Cristina's finally been discharged she stayed over here and me, Mere and George had a little 'freedom' celebration for her. So naturally Cristina's almost unconsciously asleep in the spare room and Meredith's just unconsciously asleep. I don't blame her, this whole Mr. and Mrs Dr. Sheppard is really getting to her. In bigger news George could only stay for half of tonight's celebrations. Do you know why? Probably not considering you're a diary but I'll tell you anyway. He has a date! It's sweet, he's going out with Julie, she's the mother of Damien the little boy who had a meningitis scare today. Apparently she was very thankful to hear the good news._

_I'm so bored this house is practically empty, with George out and Meredith and Cris away in their own little world I'm basically on my own. Finally some free time, and all my busy schedule allows is time to write up my day in my diary. Wow I live life in the fast lane. See; sarcasm that means the alcohols wearing off and the caffeine's kicking in. I've filled out my observation forms on last months patients for my internship, and we've got no flour to bake; I'm bored! _

_Addison's been making hints I'd be good in her line of work all week. So who do I choose the heartbroken bestfriend or the job I spent years fighting to prove I could do? Well actually I don't have to be Addison's friend I just have to work with her. Still feels like betraying Mere, and I think McDreamy's done that enough. Love's never easy, and that really sucks. I suppose if love was easy we wouldn't want it so much. To be honest right now I'm not really sure what I want. Well since we're out of any actual food I think I'm going down the shops; pick up some flour and stuff._

"Flour, butter, milk, vodka, liquorish" muttered the tall blonde as she searched through the shop isles. Obviously unaware of the co worker who'd just recognized her.

"Now that mixture would make 1 interesting cake" stated Alex quickly losing the smirk as he crept up behind her. He'd just come from the nightshift in search of something to fill up the empty cupboards of his apartment. It wasn't planned but apologising for the other night seemed like a good idea here. A public place so things couldn't get too personal but not crowded enough to get attention.

"What're you doing here" Izzie questioned masking any happiness at the familiar voice with a cold tone.

"With all takeaways closed it seems I only have 1 choice" he said holding up the boxed frozen pizza with the faintest of a smile "You need a lift home?" Sensing his apparent want to talk, Izzie decided to give him a chance plus it was getting cold out she didn't want to walk again.

"Yeah" she admitted a bit nervously whilst bagging her shopping and paying. They both got to the car with little fuss and it wasn't long till they were heading home.

"So about our date…" Alex started readying himself for an apology, something he did very, rarely in life.

"What's wrong with you?" asked Izzie with an obvious hint of concern in her voice. He'd been off character since that night.

"I can't have this us yet, I don't know how long I'll be here…"


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks so much for all the reviews they're always appreciated**

_Tuesday 11th October_

_He might be leaving! He honestly might be leaving. I'm currently writing this in bathroom, as Alex is in the kitchen keeping an eye on the cakes I'm baking. He failed the exam and now has to retake it. And after getting over the initial shock that it's possible for Alex academically fail he told me that it meant unless he passed this time he'd have to leave Seattle. That's why we can't have a relationship yet; because in 3 months he could be going home. I think I preferred thinking he was just a jerk rather than knowing I could lose him._

_Well I guess he's a little bit forgiven I did kind of allow him in the house. The problem in that being; I need to get him out before either Mere or Cris wake up or even worse…George comes in. He hasn't been in yet so I'm guessing the date went well. Oh how me and Meredith shall taunt him tomorrow. Yes it's mean but also funny. Something else kinda strange; whilst I was out someone posted the currently unconscious Meredith a letter. Judging by the handwriting on the envelope (and no I didn't read it) I think it's Shepard. The male one obviously. Why would Addison want to write?_

_Well I'd best get back to the baking/studying session with Alex. Promise to write more soon._

"How're they going?" asked the tired blonde walking back into the kitchen. Finding a tray full of ginger fairy cakes and a fast asleep Alex, his head resting on the open 'Facts & Medical Myths' book on the table. Going to find a spare blanket she silently crept out the kitchen door, coming face to face with her still hung-over bestfriend.

"Evening. Did you know there's a sleeping man in my kitchen, because you should really be aware of those things" smiled Meredith knowingly.

"Ah about that…"

"Just make sure he's awake and out of here before George gets in" she calmly advised. Izzie felt bad, Meredith was helping out with her might be lovelife even though her own wasn't doing too well. Actually that reminded her.

"Mere you got a letter" she informed the retreating woman, holding out the mystery letter.


	6. Chapter 6

**Ok I'm going to start writing smaller chapters, more often because getting the inspiration to write longer ones is difficult**

_Wednesday 12th October_

_They divorced! Evil one herself asked for a divorce. I'm still getting over the shock .McDreamy sent Mere a photocopy of the signed papers. What an old romantic. Naturally she's now gone and locked herself in her room. I did try to talk to her from the hallway but I was kinda interrupted by an awoken Alex wondering why he was woken by the squealing of 'Oh. My. God.' Then, of course Meredith shouted through door 'if I tell, George will be informed of my guest'. So, quite an uneventful night really. Oh and we've still yet to hear of George yet; date must of really well._

_Me and Alex cleaned up the kitchen then he left. I kinda felt disappointed, not that he's forgiven for being a jerk that night but I just thought he'd stay. On the sofa; of course. Well probably. Right well I should now be in work so gotta go._

"What took you so long" Cristina asked Izzie, who'd just ran into the locker-room.

"Traffic" she quickly explained before realizing Cristina shouldn't be there anyway. "We just had your Freedom party yesterday, why are you not at home recuperating?"

"My freedom, my choice. I choose this" She stated as though saying something as obvious as the sky's blue. Cris was still nursing that nagging little hangover that caffeine couldn't completely get rid. The door creaked open once more to another late arrival.

"Not a word about last night" croaked a still half asleep George, the teasing began.

"Did someone have a long night?" Cristina grinned clearly enjoying sounding evil. Both women watched in hysterics as he shuffled over to the sink to through some cold water on his face. Baily decided to check up on them all at that moment


	7. Authors Note

**Authors Note**

_I can't believe I forgot about this after all the awesome support I got in your reviews. Anyway now I have a bit of free time (not much but some lol) I've decided I'm going to continue where I left off, maybe going down a different route than Greys did (cough no Denny cough). Anyway if you guys still like this and want to read the next part: Thanks a lot!__ I'll hopefully write more at some point tomorrow, but any plot ideas you might have would be really appreciated_

_Ree xx_


	8. Chapter 7

**Okies so here's the next part as promised, I really hope some off you are still reading this. Anyway this part's dedi'd to AJeff for writing some of the best GA fics and always being so friendly. So whatever you guys think, good or bad hit that litle review button and let me know :) Thanks again and enjoy!**

Entering what she thought was an empty on call room Meredith collapsed on to the cold but comforting bed. She was on a 17 hour shift and avoiding Addison all day made things twice as difficult.

"Tough day Meredith?" called a familiar voice sat by the window. Addison had been avoiding her now ex husband all day. Despite everything in their 11 years of marriage something had changed for Derek last night. He came home, barely talked for hours before finally apologising for everything. For giving false hope and for what he was about to do; give her the divorce papers he'd signed.

"Oh hey, yeah it's been pretty tiring" yawned Meredith, suddenly very aware of her situation with the other woman in the room. She didn't really know what to say, the woman's husband had just left her for his other woman. Her.

"It was probably the reason for the divorce you know," Addison started, stopping when she saw the look of guilt on the younger woman's face in the window reflection. "No not you, though I'm sure that weighed into it" she finished with a sigh, sitting at the foot of the bed.

"What are you trying to say?" Meredith asked unsure whether the neonatal surgeon's words were just cryptic or if she really was too tired to understand at the moment.

"We lost it. That chemistry, it just went one day. We stopped paying attention to the little things, started just getting through life, taking on extra shifts, constantly going out." It seemed more like she was telling herself rather than Meredith. "I suppose it was easier to say that me cheating and him leaving was the cause, but to be honest it was a long time coming. We were on borrowed time even when I turned up here…" she seemed to trail off, now on the verge of tears.

"I'm sorry." She replied softly, putting a hand on her shoulder in attempt to comfort her on/off boyfriend's now ex wife. "If I'd have known he was married-"

"If you'd have known he was married you wouldn't have gone after him, and if I'd have realized quite how dead our marriage was before I would have came down here to give him the divorce papers and let us get on with our lives."

_Thursday 13th October_

_Ok you have no idea how weird today has been. George for once has been centre of the gossip for once. Obviously word of McDreamy and Addison's divorce hasn't gotten round yet. Anyway back to George, apparently last night for him didn't go as well as we all thought. Turns out half way through his big date he got a call off Olivia. Her apartment flooded and she was seriously distressed. So George to the rescue. He ended the date, went over, calmed her down, and helped collect what wasn't ruined. Afterwards he took her over her sisters, by the time everything was sorted out it was the middle of the night so Lisa, Olivier's sister let him crash on the sofa._

_I guess George was right when he said 'long story'. Anyway Burke and Christina seem ok again. I'm not really sure how that happened maybe major loss and major surgery can help bring people together. Maybe they just love each other? Anyway never mind talking about love, I'd rather talk about Alex. Ok we spent last night studying and so far only me and chief know about the failed exam. He's kinda back to his old self; ya know cocky, self assured, or at least acting that way. The only difference is instead of flirting with single nurses on his breaks he's studying with me. A definite improvement, in my eyes._

_Oh and I saved the best till last. Bailey wanted to see Mer for something so I went to the on call room to get her. D'you know what I saw when I got there? Well I guess being a book I'll let you off for not knowing. Meredith and 'arch enemy' Addison laughing. Yeah that pretty much shocked me. I told them Bailey wanted her and left quickly. God knows how they're getting on ok but it scares me. Anyway I'll write more later, my break's over._


	9. Chapter 8

_Saturday 15th October_

_Finally the weekend! Mind though work doesn't stop there but my shift is over and Joe's got a band in for the night. Nobody really well known, just a local band but hey live music's a nice change. Everybody's going; well everybody not working tonight. It's not something huge, but like I said a change is a change. Even Burke said he'd try to turn up, despite Christina rolling her eyes. I've been looking for something to wear; I'll probably wear my floaty blue skirt and black sweater. Everybody knows it's the shoes that are hardest to decide on. Meredith has a pair of ridiculously painful heels that look gorgeous, maybe I could borrow those?_

_Things are still really patchy between Mer and McDreamy. They get what they want and still there are issues, go figure. George has been vague about him and Olivia, personally I think he's mad for a certain housemate who's not me but that's just my theory. Maybe they'll get back together tonight but I'm not really that sure. In other news Jeff called me today, otherwise known as the hockey player ex boyfriend as Christina had renamed him. He's engaged, and wanted to let me know. Yes, because everybody wants to know their ex moved on before they did. Sometimes I wonder if I'll be single forever, being a doctor isn't exactly the most helpful profession on the dating scene. _

It was gone 11 and music was blasting from the bar most hospital staff considered a second home. Any uncertainty left between Meredith and Derek had apparently disappeared with their 3rd round of drinks. The two were sickeningly happy as they fell all over each other in time to the music. Extremely drunk and missing the people they'd rather be dancing with George and Christina danced and drank like there was no tomorrow. But there would be a tomorrow and a hell of a hangover for most people there.

"Yang dancing, and with Georgie boy now that's something I thought I'd never see" laughed Alex entering the bar and sneaking up behind the pretty blonde who was still in hysterics watching her friends antics. Being expected back at the hospital in under 6 hours had its benefits, Izzie was one of the few left there still sober and with the ability to remember a night her friends were no doubt going to be fuzzy about the next day.

"Wanna dance?" she smiled taking his hand without waiting for an answer.

"You are a distraction. I should be studying after all" replied Alex, doing nothing to stop himself being led to dance floor. It was his only night out that week, failing that exam had seriously affected hospital playboy's life. Not that spending the extra time with Izzie was something he'd complain about.

The party was almost over when Preston Burke finally turned up. An entrance welcomed by a now well and truly hammered George and Christina stumbling over to hug him. Christina hugging him Burke didn't mind, George however, well that was scary.


	10. Chapter 9

**I'm not entirely sure where I'll go from here but I've got another GA fic in the pipe line anyway, I'd really love your reviews, thanks again xx**

"Where are you going?" yawned the man waking up, as he watched his now fully clothed colleague walk towards his bedroom door

"To work" answered the intern determined not to turn around. Last night had been a mistake to Christina, a big, drunken mistake. Though she had to admit it could have been worse; she could have woken up with O'Malley.

"You're not due in till 10 it's only 8" Burke responded whilst getting dressed. He wasn't really sure what last night had meant, but he didn't want her to leave just yet.

"Well, I'm going home first" she tried again to leave, this time stopping as he followed her. "What?"

"Why are you running away?" he asked with double meaning, he'd been there for her in the hospital by then it may have been a little late but then again she'd never told him she was pregnant.

"Because…because, because you broke up with me, I wasn't going to keep the baby, I'm ok now and last night we were drunk. Last night was a mistake and-"

Burke placed a hand on her shoulder to calm her down, and then kissed her. Christina didn't have anything else to say.

_Sunday 16th October_

_My shift started at 5 this morning, which is usually fine because I've slept a few hours before. Yesterday was different though, up till about half an hour before I was due back I'd spent the night dancing with Alex, George and Christina. Well till Burke turned up, and a few drinks later and him and Christina were gone. Now that will be something to talk about. Soon after Alex offered me and George a lift home. I needed to get home to change for shift and George; well he just needed to get some sleep. He slept almost as soon as he got in the car. _

_So, this is a short entry but I'll write more soon. I think I'm getting used to this whole keeping a diary thing._


End file.
